What's in a name?

Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin recently had their second child who they promptly named Moses. Their first child was named Apple. Now I'm all for parents naming their children whatever they like but I just wonder sometimes if parents realize just what they're getting their kids into when they give them such complex or unusual names. I can understand some of the motivation if it's based on the times we live in. I mean I can probably have a good guess as to Frank Zappa's frame of mind when he named his daughter Moon Unit.

It probably wouldn't be a bad thing if Apple and Moses' parents remain famous celebrities until the time that they themselves are old enough to establish themselves. But what if that's not the case? Supposing the kids end up going to public schools where younger kids could care less who your parents are. Can you imagine the jokes and teasing that these kids would undergo? Kids can be cruel and it isn't fair to give fodder for them to feed off of. Now Apple and Moses are not extremely weird but I am just waiting for the day when we hear about Stix or Elbow being born to some celebrity couple.

The thing is that these names do have some deeper meaning for the parents as all child names do. Some parents name their kids after family members, or a combination of the mom and dad's names. Some names are based on the lunar calender or where the child was conceived. Some names are based on where the mother was when the child first kicked in the womb. And some are just chosen to be unique.

Again... there's nothing inherently wrong with naming your child Apple, Moses, Windex or Starbuck but just remember one thing. Eventually these kids are going to have careers. Do you think an HR manager is going to think more than ten seconds about someone with the name IHOP? Similarly... for the sake of arguement, supposing these kids end up following their parents into celebrityhood; given the often superficial nature of the entertainment world, can you imagine James Bond, twenty years from now, being played by Dweeb Johnson? I think not.