Office Knowledge by Osmosis

If there's one thing people take away from their old biology lessons either intentionally or unintentionally, it's the theory of osmosis which is to say that you absorb what you need by being in close proximity to the source of 'knowledge' or sustenance. In this case, I have sat in relatively close proximity to office copiers and printers my entire career and as such, I'm assumed to be the 'leading' expert on what to do if there are errors or problems. It's a bit flattering to think that people assume that I'm skilled enough to repair the things but it's not always possible.

I think Jerry Seinfeld said it best when he said that most men aren't mechanically inclined though we wish we were and that when cars break down, we pop the hood as if we'll know what the problem is but the entire time we're looking for a flashing sign which says, "here's the problem!" Unfortunately the instances of that happening, at least for the time being, are slim to none. That's not to say that I can't handle most copier problems that crop up from time to time but it amazes me that the rest of us, can't seem to cope. Take for example the occasional paper jam. In the old days it would have meant calling a technician because to get inside these beasts was a chore in and of itself, now the process has been somewhat simplified. The screens usually tell us how to go through the steps to see where the jam is.

Still, I think for some this is still too much effort. These are also usually the ones who have trouble with visual directions and think a nightmare scenario is to assemble furniture from Ikea which only comes with pictures, that too vague at times. But I have sat in my office or cubicle for years and watched as people struggle to understand the seemingly puzzling statement 'PC Load Letter'. Now I am an expert by osmosis apparently but even someone with a few seconds to think about it should think to open the tray and see if there's any paper left in the printer. That's beyond the mental grasp of some users. Others have problems simply finding the loading tray.

I can recall a few instances where people have jammed the machine, usually with personal work, and then have been unable to clear the jam so what do they do? They walk off quickly and hope to God that someone comes along to clear the jam. At first I used to be the sucker who went ahead and cleared the jam but then I realized that people took it for granted that I would do it and rather than being looked upon as an analyst or financial person, I was relegated to the task of copier and printer maintenance. If someone's printer / copier ran out of toner, I was generally the one they called to make the repairs and fix them. The last straw came when someone across the building who I didn't even know called me up and asked me to come by and take a look at their printer to replace the toner.

Now I'm all for helping people with such cases if I am in the area but I don't do housecalls. After that I decided that unless it was someone I knew having problems with the copier, I would avoid going out of my way to help them. Call it being a jerk but it was getting to the point where people weren't even trying to solve the problems themselves but just began pushing buttons at random for two seconds and then walking over to me to ask if I knew what the problem was. Case in point, a few days ago our building had a leak and water was dripping on the copier so a person going to use it let me know and together the two of us moved the machine after unplugging it. We left a sign on the wall in front of it indicating that it was down due to possible water damage. About half an hour later a guy walks in and starts cursing at the machine and comes over to ask me if I know what's the matter. I ask him if it's plugged in (which I know it's not) and he agrees that it isn't so then I ask if there's a sign on the wall at which time he finally notices the problem. Perhaps my actions were jerk-like but if we don't teach children how to walk, they shall never run. Same goes for copier operations.