Pet Peeves at the Gym

The recent fracas with congressional leader Larry Craig and his bathroom habits have brought to light lots of questions on bathroom ettiquette and what things do and don't mean. Yesterday as I chugged away on the elliptical machine at the gym, I realized that there are lots of places where there are unwritten rules on ettiquette and actions that we sub-consciously follow. It doesn't mean that if you break them it means anything more or less but it's something that seems to come to us by osmosis. Still, there are those who choose not to follow these generalities or perhaps, they just seem not to follow them because they don't want to.

Now anyone who has read my blog for any significant amount of time will know that I'm a fairly regular gym-goer. I attempt to workout several times a week and in the past few weeks I'm happy to report that I've started seeing some results in terms of my fitness levels and shape. It's motivation that keeps you going. People have sometimes asked me how it is that I can keep going on the treadmill or elliptical machine for such long periods of time and not get bored and either music or television can help distract you enough that you can complete hours and miles on a machine in no time. Still, with all the news reports on Craig on the news it was hard not to think about what goes on in the world around us. I mean who knew that tapping a foot, reaching under a stall, and playing a bit of grab-ass could mean so much? If we are to believe Craig, apparently he didn't. But I digress.

I had occasion to think about the environment at the gym and pick up on some peeves of mine that I have experienced in the past but haven't always written down so I thought I'd go through a typical visit to the gym and recount some of my experiences. I usually get there in the afternoon just before the evening crush begins. That being the case, I can usually get to the machine I want and begin my routine. My gym is large enough that I can usually get to the machine I need without a wait but there are some who love only a certain machine at a certain spot and if they don't get it they tend to get pissy. That's definitely on my list of peeves. I mean after all, we're all paying for the gym, we all have equal rights to the machines. If you want this particular machine then I suppose you'll have to wait for it.

Not one to be rushed, I continue my workout and in an effort to distract myself, I start looking around for friends or familiar faces who may be at the gym. Not so much to get a conversation going but to at least feel as though I'm among friends. On my left pumping away furiously on another elliptical machine is a young woman who would make a skeleton look fat. She's pumping away as if she's generating power for the entire state of Virginia. She hardly ever slows her pace and continues churning as if she's determine to lose weight in her bones as well as in her figure. On the one hand I'm envious seeing as how she's into negative body fat ranges but I feel a bit perplexed as to why she's wanting to continue to burn fat as she appears set to do. I notice what she's reading and I realize she's reading a health magazine and see that she's reading up on how to lose weight and slim down her waist.

Now this isn't necessarily a peeve of mine but more of a perplexity as to how someone who is already slimmed down always appears next to you when you're attempting to workout and lose weight. Perhaps it's a spectre of what could happen if you overdo it. Still, my confusion is broken by the fact that a person close by to me is suddenly speaking quite loudly. With my iPod going I suddenly think that perhaps it's an emergency or something requiring someone to shout out for help when I suddenly realize that it's just someone speaking on their cell phone. With the din of the gym and all, it's hard to hear so those of us on the same floor as the caller are lucky (and I say that with all due sarcasm) to hear their side of the conversation. Oh joy.

Despite turning up the music a bit it's still hard to drown out the seemingly one-sided conversation but over time, your mind tends to drown it out automatically. I'm at a bit of a loss though as to why someone would want to share their conversation (at least part of it) with the rest of us. I don't know about others out there but I'm not particularly keen on hearing about how wasted someone was last weekend and how they threw up all over $500 shoes. Speaking of which, I'm a bit confused also by the people at the gym who appear to be there to push their own social agendas and nothing more. That social agenda being to meet and talk with as many people as they can without doing anything else. I mean when I'm lifting weights or doing sit ups, I don't fancy having a conversation with a complete stranger.

So then I move on to lifting weights and using the machines. Now what's with the guys who will more or less establish squatter's rights on a particular machine and then refuse to move. I mean they will do a set and then go wander off and then return several minutes later to complain if they find you on the machine. I guess the rest of us are supposed to realize intuitively that when you're standing a hundred feet away speaking with someone else while leaning on another machine that you'll probably return to do another set sometime within the next half hour and that it is akin to the greatest sin to reset the machine while you're gone. That being the case, then I will happily commit that sin. Again, I'm paying for usage of the place too so I will use it when it's free and it's not obvious that you're coming back.

Working out aside, there are certain things that people have a tendency to do in the locker rooms that can be a bit aggravating too. I mean I am not a prude by any means. I'm not one of those guys who will duck into a toilet stall to change my clothes or get dressed after taking a shower, but that doesn't mean I walk around in the locker room without a towel or clothes as if I am actually wearing them. I mean there are some guys who think that their birthday suit is an actual suit of clothes. Believe me... it isn't. I don't need to see you walking around dripping sweat or bath water all over the place after your workout. I'm not shy but I don't go out of my way to prove it. And speaking of towels, what's with the assumption on the part of so many out there that once you're done with a towel, you can drop it on the floor and leave.

I often wonder if these people are the same way at home. I know that we are all paying for the gym and gym services (which include towel service in a lot of cases) but that doesn't mean drop the towel where you are and continue on your merry way. I find it highly annoying to find a locker filled with used wet towels or have to pick my way across the floor to get to my locker. For the most part, we're all adults, so then why don't you act like it? Stop expecting to be treated like a king and go and toss your towel in the numerous hampers set up around the place. I mean it's not like it takes much extra effort. Things and incidents like that can be highly frustrating at times but still, they are minor when it comes to the overall greater good which is working out and getting in shape.