Unravel the Mystery

One of the oldest expressions I know is 'beating a dead horse.' However, after looking at this photo, I think the more appropriate phrase would be 'never take a dead horse to a party.' This photo, for those who aren't familiar with it, was taken sometime between 1876 and 1884 in Wisconsin. What is odd about it is that no one has been able to identify the gentleman in the photo nor explain what he is doing dressed as if out for a night on the town seated on a dead horse. It's a curious thing to see and apparently it has sprung up all over the internet thanks to various people blogging about it or attempting to make jokes on the situation. And believe me, the situation in the photo certainly lends itself to some fine jokes.

The photo has been making the rounds for some time now though no one has been able to explain the reason it was taken or whether the horse is actually dead or just laying down for a quick rest. Since happening upon the photo I have been oddly fascinated by it. Now before people begin wondering if I'm a psycho or something, please relax. The idea of sitting on a dead horse is sickening to me. No, the fascination I feel is in trying to figure out what the whole idea is behind the photo. If you look around, the street is almost completely deserted. There is the guy in the background with what appears to be a dog sniffing at his leg. There are a few other people hanging about in the background as well. I guess even in the 1800's there were rubberneckers.

If one were so inclined, it would be possible to come up with a theory as to how and why this photo was taken. It just so happens that I am inclined. Looking at the dress of the gentleman on the horse it appears as if he was on his way to a party. We can assume as much since his clothes do not reflect a night (or day) of heavy partying or any other sort of revelry. As such we can rule out the possibility of this being a drunk driving accident. The horse doesn't appear to have run itself to death seeing as how there is no sign of it having slid to a stop; rather it appears to have just dropped on the spot. Perhaps the 'battery' is dead.

The guy with the dog seem a bit too nonchalant about the whole thing and perhaps it is because he had something to do with the horse being down on the ground. His hands appear to be in the classic, "I'm just standing here minding my own business." pose. Perhaps his hands are hiding the one key piece of evidence that would reveal the mystery behind the horse being on the ground. The dog seems to sense it; perhaps that's why the dog is sniffing around so much. You would think (and this is a big assumption seeing as how I've never owned a dog) that if the dog belongs to the guy, why would he be sniffing around someone he already knows.

The guys way in the background seem to be the usual crop of gawkers that seem to mystically appear whenever there is something to be gawked at. They are keeping their distance and don't appear to be moving closer which seems to imply that something is rather amiss and they are hesitating to get involved. The gentleman is not looking in their direction nor is he looking at the cameraman either. It appears he's just taking a break from doing whatever it was he was doing and decided to have a sit. Nothing else seems to be happening in the photo. The horse shows no indication of having died from anything odd. All seems to be normal other than the fact that the horse is laying down as opposed to standing up. So what is happening then? Here's my theory.

The guy with the dog is the owner of the local tavern though his reputation is a bit shady. The gentleman on the horse was on his way to his girlfriend's house so he decided to take a bottle of wine along to give to his girl's father. Being somewhat new to town he decided to go to dog guy's tavern and buy a bottle. Prior to getting there he stopped in at the other shops and asked around and though the guys in the background warned him, the gentleman decided to go to the tavern anyways. The gentleman ignored all quips about the townsfolk had about the tavern serving up liquor strong enough to put a horse to sleep. So he goes in and buys a bottle which the dog guy warns is pretty strong. Not being one to believe in heresay, the gentleman decides to give his horse a taste. After all, he's on his way to impress his girl's father; it would be best not to give him inferior stuff. Meanwhile, the local reporter for the paper is walking along and hears the whole exchange and decides to keep an eye on the proceedings. The gentleman gives the horse a taste; immediately the horse rears up and collapses to the ground with a loud whinney. Everyone rushes out to see what the commotion is and realizes that the gentleman has put the tavern's liquor to the ultimate test. Seeing the horse on the ground the town decides to pass an ordanance banning drinking at dog guy's tavern. This photo ended up being the key piece of evidence. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.